In November, 2008, my wife and I were sitting in the living room, probably watching TV. This was after we got our new furniture delivered and about 6 months after I started using my wheelchair to go to and from. I had started falling down after just a few steps and it seemed to make sense. I could still wheel to the back porch and get to a chair on the back porch but I had to wait a spell before I would try and get up and come back in. I don’t do that anymore.
Anyway, we were sitting there and she said to me, “I’m no longer giving in to you. I’ve been doing it since Beech Hollow.” When I asked her what she meant, she got up and walked out of the room and sat at her computer. I waited and asked her a few weeks later what she meant and she did the same thing.
I can sort of guess what a person means when they say something like that as I certainly understand what the words mean but how they apply to me/us I was confused and a bit hurt. I started trying to figure out what she meant and what she thought I had done but nothing ever came to mind. I thought I had given her everything physically, mentally or emotionally she could want or need. I spared no expense of time, money and emotion whenever she or anyone in her family wanted or needed anything and I could provide it. It really did bring me lots of joy especially if it did the same for them.
We moved from Beech Hollow at http://maps.google.com/maps?f=q&source=s_q&hl=en&geocode=&q=5830+Beech+Hollow+Dr,+Indianapolis,+IN+46254&aq=1&sll=40.046392,-86.114123&sspn=0.007704,0.019205&ie=UTF8&hq=&hnear=5830+Beech+Hollow+Dr,+Indianapolis,+Indiana+46254&z=16 in 1996 to a house we had built in Westfield at http://maps.google.com/maps?f=q&source=s_q&hl=en&geocode=&q=2902+Crosscreek+Cir,+Westfield,+IN+46074&aq=0&sll=39.951069,-86.261902&sspn=0.123435,0.307274&ie=UTF8&hq=&hnear=2902+Crosscreek+Cir,+Westfield,+Indiana+46074&z=16 where after 21 years I finally spent my GI Bill. I’m glad I had that too as she said her credit was bad and still recovering. I felt bad just having it in my name but figured that could be corrected someday.
In 2005 we had an opportunity to move into a house she never lived in but always wanted to. Her parents (Dad #3) wanted to build a house in the town her mom grew up in. They had lived here at least 30 years and to say it was a fixer upper ain’t doing it justice. Seen The Money Pit http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0091541/? It did have some good qualities: near both our jobs (I was a bit closer); lots of property to take care of (we both liked to garden); nearer other relatives; in Indianapolis; we could carry on the tradition of the family/holiday dinners; and to top it off, it would fulfill a dream of her’s: to live where all her family had lived but her. Even though there were some challenges ahead, we both felt we had good-paying jobs and could handle it. Life’s an adventure right?
Again, that being the case, why were these unsolicited comments made or deeds performed after we moved to Westfield in 1996:
- I got the best brother.
- I like watching you chop wood without your shirt on.
- I will lose weight so you will have a Carmel housewife.
- A surprise Christmas gift (‘99?) arrived for me while I was at the grocery store. (What timing huh?) It was a snow blower (never had one before). I don’t know how she pulled it off but she sure made me smile!
Not to limit what was discussed but hope you get my meaning.
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